Rural Women Rock!

Thanks to Facebook, I have found a group of Amazing Women at Rural Women Rock -- created by a sweet lady named Kasse Duffy, this blog is a wonderful place to connect with some friendly, intelligent, compassionate, creative women who cherish rural life - whether they live on a farm, a ranch or on a busy street in the city, as I do. Today, I am privileged to be a guest poster on the blog!

kimB from Alaska, here. After reading through the posts from the recent guest bloggers at RWR, I took a deep breath and put in my name as an applicant. It's been wonderful meeting and learning about all you lovely, interesting women and while I am certainly not as accomplished as you are in the areas of farm life or community involvement, I am hoping that sharing a bit about myself and life in Alaska will be interesting to some. Currently, I reside in Anchorage - the largest city in the state (population just under 300,000) - but prior to moving here about 18 months ago, we lived for 10 years in Eagle River (a community of approx 30,000) which, technically, is part of the Anchorage Borough, but located about 10 miles north and would definitely be considered "rural."

Moose in my backyard

Anchorage Skyline

Mt. McKinley

 
 I was born in Juneau and have lived in Alaska for 50 of my 54 years.  I am married, the mother of four adult children, "gammie" of a toddler and a newborn and a follower of Jesus Christ. I love music, reading, traveling with my Husband, hanging out with family and friends, beading, paper-crafting -- but my passion is photography and digital art. I tell people, "Developing fluid flows through my veins," because my father's side of the family - as far back as my great-grandfather in the early 1900s - had that same passion. As the only child of my parents, I have inherited literally thousands of photos, slides and negatives from that side of the family. I have used many in scrapbook layouts, but most are in boxes, waiting for me to "have the time" {ha} to organize, make digital copies and display them in great and meaningful works of art...

My Husband & me

Jenni & Ivory's Wedding

Matthew & Sarah's Wedding

Granddaughter Amelia

Grandson Adrian

Which leads me to the digital part of my passion for photgraphy. About three and a half years ago, I began learning how to (correctly) use Adobe Photoshop Elements -- and I was "swayed to the dark side" as some of us digital scrapbooks like to say :) Since May 2008, I have never made another layout using paper or scissors or glue.  I've gone 100% digital.  Some folks -- I used to be one of them -- claim that digital is nice, but cannot compare to the satisfaction of playing with the physical elements and embellishments and printed photos. I agree that the tactile experience is lovely - and I find that fulfillment by making cards and mini-scrapbook albums on occasion.  But other than the actual act of shooting photos, nothing gives me a greater thrill than editing those photos to my satisfaction and then arranging them on a digital page and printing them out for gifts and for my own albums.

Gecko

Amelia Ann

Louie & Ahpun at the Alaska Zoo

 My favorite type of digital editing, however, is using digital textures and "clipping masks" on my photos to give an artistic feel. I like to add Scripture or inspirational quotes or even a single encouraging word, print it out and frame for a gift or for hanging on my own wall. I am working up the courage to try selling these artistic prints. Mostly, I want others to be drawn to the Lord by viewing His creation... But -- to be frank -- I could use a few extra dollars, too!

I have three blogs - one for crafting, one for photography and one I began in August as a way to put my thoughts, fears and prayers "down on paper" as I travel a new road in my life, attempting to discover who "kimmie" truly is. You see, my beloved Husband of 17 years has bipolar and during a "cycle" last year, he declared that he is gay. Well... that bit of news certainly changed the dynamics of our union, to say the least. Not that our love for and commitment to one another is over - it isn't. But life is different. And so, I am wanting to learn about me, now; get some healing; surround myself with my local and cyber girlfriends. There's nothing I can do for my Husband but to pray for him and to keep on loving him. But there *are* things I can do for myself. So this new blog, called "Exodus ~ My Journey to the Promised Land," was created as a way to put down my thoughts in order to gain a better understanding about myself and my life. Unfortunately, I have only made three posts there and have not kept up with it the way I had hoped, though I am currently in the process of drafting an "update" post. My photography blog is the most active and my crafting blog is even less active than the "Exodus" blog, though I hope to update it soon as well.

I have greatly enjoyed my time here at RWR thus far. Learning about each of you is fascinating and meeting Kasse has been a delight! I hope to make some new friends here and am always willing and eager to share Alaska with anyone who is interested. If you would llike to check out my blogs, here are the links:

Clique (photo blog)

Exodus ~ My Journey to the Promised Land

Divine Inspirations (craft blog)

Hugs from Alaska ~ kim

It Can Only Get Better From Here...Right?

Today did not start out well. I have an attitude this morning and, although my Beloved is cheerful and doing well mood-wise, I am irritable and snippy and whiney.  The sun is out and the sky is blue for the first time in several days, but I cannot appreciate it because all I can think of is, "we're getting divorced."

But then, I opened my "Love Letter" a few minutes ago and my heart is touched by the words I read...

My Bride,I came for you to experience a meaningful life; a life filled with divine intervention; a life that leaves a legacy. I want to invite you to Lose yourself in Me today and you will find renewed passion for living and the peace your heart longs for.

If you will look today towards heaven instead of around you, I will open your eyes to the many blessings you may be missing. I want to be the One to bring delight to your day. Take a chance with your Savior and Let go of your will for today and grab hold of Mine.

It's time, My beloved, to let Your Lord show you the real way to live a day with Me--to walk knowing you are blessed by Me. Now take a deep breath and receive my life-giving, soul-satisfying day that is yours for the asking!

Love,
Your Prince and Joy

In today's post there is also a prayer - which I did actually pray aloud - that speaks what is in my heart --

A Prayer to My Prince,

Are you really the One who can lift my spirits and show me the way to a life of joy and happiness? I so want to believe You. I want to grab hold of Your hand and let You lead me to Your divine love. So take me me Lord and show me the way of life.

Amen

I don't know how many more days my Beloved and I will have together as Husband and wife. I know that our love for one another will not die, but it's also a real possibility that we will never have a committed union together ever again.  I am praying that the remainder of our time together will be calm, peaceful, friendly, respectful and that I will be able to show GOD's love for my Husband regardless of the circumstances.

Be Blessed ~ klb

The Lord will perfect that which concerns me...

I subscribe to a daily email called, His Princess Love Letters by Sheri Rose Shepherd. This morning's post was titled, "Open Your Gifts." 

 My Gifted Bride,
I have placed a gift inside your soul that will bring you great joy and purpose. It's buried inside you waiting to be discovered. Don't let it be swallowed up by daily distractions and drowned by disappointment.

When you are ready to open your heart to Me and receive from your eternal Husband, I will show you how to unwrap your hopes and dreams and teach you to be who I made you to be. I am the giver of every good and perfect gift, so don't be afraid, My beloved to believe what I say.

The gift I offer you is everlasting and priceless.

Love,
Your Gift-giving Prince

"The LORD will perfect that which concerns me;
         Your mercy, O LORD, endures forever;
         Do not forsake the works of Your hands."

Psalm 138:8 NKJV

One of the "gifts" I believe the Lord has given me is that of creativity - specifically in the area of photography. He has blessed me with a "photographer's eye" and I often literally feel a thrill rush through me when I happen upon a scene or object that cries out to be captured on {digital} film. Along with shooting the photos, I also delight in the digital processing of them - increasing contrast, adding a soft blur or desaturating the colors to change the mood of a photo.  In addition, I enjoy using digital textures and brushes to add an artistic quality to my images and I often include a word, quote or Scripture to express my faith, offer encouragement or share a message.

Something I've been considering off and on for a couple of years has now become an every day thought -- going public with my photo art and offering pieces for sale online. I am eager to do this, yet also reluctant to put myself "out there" and open my heart to yet more rejection. If this idea works, I may be able to supplement my income - a definite necessity - but more importantly, I will be able to share my faith, my witness to GOD's beauty, majesty, mercy, grace and love.  My objective would not be to make money, but to share the love of Christ with those who would see my pieces.  The joy is in the process and in knowing that others are being touched.

But, rejection is still a big thing for me and with what I am going through now - the end of my marriage - I don't know if it's worth the risk. Plus, if I go to the expense and energy of setting up shop online and nothing sells -- that's money I cannot afford to lose. On the other hand, is it realistic to expect success right away?  It could take several months before I see any interest in my work.  When I post things in my photo blog or on Facebook, a few people will comment on the work, but often, no one even looks.  So what if the same thing happens with an online shop?

Well, maybe I should read through that letter from my King again and take to heart what He's saying to me, "...don't be afraid, Beloved..."  I guess I should gather up my pennies and get a few of my pieces printed out to make sure they are good enough to actually sell.  If so, I'll begin the process of opening a shop. If not -- back to the drawing board.

Be Blessed ~ klb

I Can Do ALL Things Through CHRIST Who Strengthens Me

Even this.


In my mind's eye, I see myself stepping through a portal. The opening through which I've come softly closes behind me as I gaze about in wonder at this new land, this never-before-experienced world where I, as a middle-aged woman, feel both bewilderment and excitement.  It's rather like the scene in the Wizard of Oz movie when Dorothy steps out of her black & white world and sees color for the first time. I am eager to begin my new life, my journey to discover who I am in Christ, yet I am tempted to keep a foot stuck in that portal - reluctant to completely separate myself from my black & white world where life is familiar, even if it's not all that comfortable or safe.  But it's familiar - and in that, I find security.


Perhaps I should back up a bit and explain a few things. At this point in my life, I am not a new convert to Christianity. I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Saviour in April 1984 and have been walking with Him these past 27+ years. True -- I have not always walked with both feet on the path, so to speak.  There have been times of stumbling, times of wandering and times of firmly marching the straight-and-narrow - but Jesus has been walking with me every step of the way. And during those times when my feet left the path, I believe He waited patiently for my return, always ready and eager to reach out His hand and pull me close when I'd lose my way and call out to Him.  Like a lost lamb bleating for her Shepherd.


Given our history together then, why do I claim that I am now breaking out of bondage to sin? Didn't I do that when I got saved? Well yes, in one way I did. When I humbled myself before the Lord, confessed my sins and sought His forgiveness, He literally wiped the slate clean; removed my sin as far as the east is from the west. But I have come to realize that when we ask Jesus to come live in us and we become GOD's child and a fellow-heir with Christ, that doesn't mean the rest of our lives will be perfect, or that WE will be perfect because of our salvation.  It is a life-long process. Things happen - good and evil - that the Father uses to shape us and mold us into the image of the Son. In some ways, over the years I have come to resemble Jesus -- but there is still part of my character that is pharisaical (judgemental, critical, etc) and that has caused me to behave in way that does not display the Christ-like characteristics of love, mercy and grace.  That, right there, is a big part of the darkness I'm choosing to leave behind.


Another part of the life I'm leaving behind, is that of being a wife. After a nearly 20-year relationship - 17 of them as Husband & wife - it was agreed yesterday that we will dissolve our union.  To be honest, I am heart-broken as I love my Husband very much -- but I am not "broken" because of this.  My heart is somewhat fragile and tender at the moment, but though this season of my life is ending, I'm still here and I know GOD has something planned for me.  Something far grander than I can even imagine.  It is my hope and prayer that my Beloved and I will one day be reunited and our marriage restored, but how it all turns out will be revealed in time.


In GOD's perfect time.


Meanwhile, I look forward to learning more about who "kimmie" really is; about how my Abba-Father sees me. I offer myself up to Him, to become all that He has created me to be. As I begin this new part of my life, I pray that all that I do and have and am will bring glory, honor and praise to His Name and will draw others to the saving love of Jesus Christ.


Thanks for joining me on my journey ~ klb